No Competition from Me

For the second time in my life. I was tried in a way that I just felt sorry for the girl. Moreover, made me think “Someone tell me what the fuck this girl is talking about?”

This time it was a text but:

“DID (lame ass guy name) say you were the (las time, it was “prettiest”, now it was “most beautiful”) girl in (the first time, it was California, this time it was San Jose)? That’s what he said to me.”

Again, I am left to think: “Why would that be important to you?”

I mean, I know why, we know why. Moreover, listen when I type this (hear it in my annoying ass voice too), Because I’m tired of some women trying me like this

SO,  I DON’T COMPETE WITH OTHER WOMEN WHEN IT COMES TO THE AFFECTIONS OF MEN.

I put that shit in all caps, so you would understand where im coming from. A point of frustration.

If I needed that kind of competition, I would of started young, very young, like in high school.

I would of tried in college,  but then I went to SF state, no you know, pointless.

Why would I need validation of my physical beauty by telling another woman some man validated my physical beauty? Does that not sound crazy to you?

I don’t want to compete with my friends, I have too many things and people to destroy, last thing I need is a friend I can’t trust.

Let us be real, I do not survive in those kind of friendships anyway. It is very clear now, right?

I do not understand why some women keep trying to play that game with me.  It is just not me. It can be you. If male attention is what you thirst for in life, then who am I to say its wrong? bbbuuutttt, you are not going to start telling me and acting like it is for my own benefit to care.  Because, you know, you are going to reach a dead end.

 

For me, let me put this way, and I hope it touches and agrees with your spirit: What is understood, needs no understanding. So for a woman to keep advertising what some guy said to her, when he said it, and what she said back. Means to me that you must either feed of that kind of energy, or you are dying to prove to me how cool and sexy you are. Both which is a fail.

Honestly, I care about one man’s validation: and he is in Portugal, still ignoring me, so all this other stuff is trivial at best.

I wish I would be out here competing for what a man told me to another woman, do you know how crazy that is? Britney Spears 2007 crazy. Let another woman come at me like, and I just my slap her with my backhand. Like, I really hate stuff like this.

I like to be me, and if I feel I can’t be myself around you. I stop hanging out, I just stop.

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